Once you’ve got all your material and have checked all your facts, you’re ready to go through your manuscript more slowly and carefully, checking for basic punctuation, spelling, and grammar mistakes, but also looking for less obvious but common problems writers often trip over.
Hunt down and eliminate words or phrases that are. . .
Instead of “At this point in time,” say “now.” You can almost always delete these words: really, very, actually, suddenly, and currently.
I’ve started to reduce my use of the word “that” but be careful about omitting it completely. Sometimes the word is necessary for the rhythm or logic of a sentence.
Redundant and superfluous (see what I did there?)
This should be, you know, blatantly obvious but, sadly, it isn’t. Avoid overstatements such as “catastrophic disaster,” “close proximity,” and “plan in advance.” Another cringe-worthy example is “free gift.” Isn’t a gift, by definition, free? All novels are fiction. All surprises are unexpected.
Also be careful when phrasing actions. For example, “He shrugged his shoulders” or “He nodded his head.” Only shoulders can shrug and only heads can nod.
“Child killers should be locked up.” Are you talking about children who kill or people who kill children? Reading your work back to yourself s-l-o-w-l-y will help you catch phrasing that might be awkward or easily misinterpreted.
Lacklustre (particularly verbs)
In Words Fail Me, Patricia T. O’Connor writes: “Find an interesting verb and the rest of the sentence will practically take care of itself.” Avoid these:
- Passive verbs – Instead of “That car was bought by Janice,” write “Janice bought that car.”
- Equating verbs – Instead of “This action is a denial of human rights,” write “This action denies human rights.”
- “Making” verbs – Instead of “That experience made me a stronger person,” write “That experience strengthened me.”
- Verbs that need nouns – Instead of “He gained entrance,” write “He entered.”
- Verbs that need adverbs – Instead of “He ran quickly,” write “He sprinted.”
- Verbs that make dialogue awkward – It’s not a rule that you can’t replace “said” with a verb that encapsulates a character’s full response (for example: “I’m glad to hear that,” she smiled.) but don’t overdo it. Use “said” whenever possible because it fades into the background and doesn’t jar the reader.
Descriptive instead of declarative
Every writer has heard it: Show, don’t tell. Sometimes a reminder helps. Show a character’s emotions by his actions instead of telling the reader how he feels or relying on adjectives. Instead of “Roger was very, very angry,” say, “Roger slammed his palm onto the table. The coffee mug fell off the edge and shattered. He didn’t notice.”
Good writing is as much about the words you take out as the words you put in.